How We Talk About Death

As much fun as it is to dissect the phrases that we hear every day, the types of language that we save for special occasions can tell us just as much about how the human mind works. While it's not on most people's daily agenda, the language we use when talking about death is very unique.

Most people don't flat out say that their relative/friend/pet died. You're much more likely to hear that "they passed away" or "they're gone" or "they're in a better place." Euphemisms are extremely common when talking about death, which makes sense due to the extreme emotions connected to death. Using the words "died" or "death" scares people because there are only negative connotations. They're very straightforward words with very specific connotations. On the other hand, saying someone "passed away" or is "in a better place" sounds much nicer and has connotations with peace.

Another interesting characteristic is the common use of figurative language in reference to death. One of the most common ways to talk about death is that it is "like falling asleep." The large majority of the human population has fallen asleep many more times than has died. By comparing death to a daily process, death is made to sound more natural and less painful. At the same time, it also makes it sound more poetic and beautiful. Using figurative language instead of literal language allows for more creativity with the concept of death, and makes it easier to talk about death.

Some of the most interesting uses of language are not seen everyday, such as the language of death. However, it's still important to analyze, because our use of language in reference to less popular subjects reveals a lot about humans.

The Tormentor

Standing in the doorway
For months you've been a presence

Sometimes leaving for weeks at a time
Other times still like a statue

Why was it so much crueler
For you to stand and watch

Then to wait to come
When Time called you here?

You chose to taunt and haunt
To create suspense and fear

Because why should you give me the gift
Of sweet blissful ignorance?

You were too clever for that.
No, you were too proud to hide yourself

Instead you let me see that you were poised
Ready to take your prize, yet holding back

With your merciless eyes and cold stare
You stalked and waited with precision

When I least expected it, least wanted it
When I was away, was distracted

That was when you decided to swoop in
To steal her away, you cowardly bastard

It would have been too kind, too merciful
For you to have stayed away until The Time

It was too tempting to flaunt your power
To come and go unpredictably

And now I am left with a hole in my heart
Once filled by the love that you ripped out

But you, because you are a shameless coward,
Won't dare to show your face again for a while

So that I will be enticed into deceptive forgetfulness
Until I rarely think about your cruelty

And when the wound is old and almost closed,
Then you will rear your ugly head

And torment me again,
Trapping me in yet another cruel game of When

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For this piece, I wanted to express some very strong emotions that I was feeling. I felt like the best way to do this would be to use apostrophe, since I could address my emotions towards something. Since my feelings weren't directed towards a person, I also utilized personification so that I could better express myself. Using apostrophe allowed me to express anger and bitterness, since it makes the poem sound like a dialogue I am having with someone, instead of just writing out my feelings. I think that the personification is also important since it makes the abstraction easier to visualize and understand.

As a side note, I'd like to point out that originally, I did not include the word "bastard" because I don't believe in using profanity unless absolutely necessary. However, in this case, I felt that any other word would not carry the weight that I needed it to carry.

The Language of Teachers

Despite our exposure to it at least five days a week, we rarely ever talk about the language that teachers use. Every day, our teachers riddle their lectures and classes with carefully chosen words and phrases in order to get us to behave a certain way. Whether it's emphasizing a fact or trying to get us to start studying, teachers' words are cleverly chosen and utilized.

The first case is when teachers use repetition in order to get us to pay attention to something. Whenever a teacher talks about a particularly important concept or fact, they will make sure to emphasize it by writing it on the board and repeating it for the class. While it's not uncommon for a teacher to simply repeat the phrase of importance, an even more noticeable technique is to use an anaphora. For example, my history teacher told the class, "You need to study the vocabulary, study the maps, and study your notes." Not only does this emphasize the action of studying, but it also makes it sound like a list. This simple use of language makes our brains wake up and notice that we are being given something to pay attention to. If the teacher had instead said, "Look at the vocabulary, analyze the maps, and review your notes," there wouldn't be as many people paying attention. This isn't necessarily because the students are disinterested in the class, but rather that there are certain literary devices that are more likely to capture our attention.

Teachers also carefully choose their diction in order to convince us to do something, such as a project or studying. Two common examples are whenever a teacher says, "We need to have the project in by Friday," or "We should make sure we master the vocabulary." Even though it's usually just the students, not the teacher and the students, who need to complete the assignment, using "we" gives an important attitude. Using "we" gives a sense of community, as if the teacher is just another student in the class (which you could argue that they are, except that they're the one giving out grades). It also avoids the patronizing air of saying "you need to do something," because it's less of a command and more of a statement.

Another interesting element of the language that teachers use is that they say "please" a lot. Whether it's, "Please remember to finish the packet by Monday," or "Please give yourself time to study," teachers are constantly adding "pleases" to their sentences. Why? It's not like teachers have to ask you to do your assignments; if you don't, it's your own fault and you hurt yourself for it. However, by using "please" in a sentence, the teacher is making the sentence into a request rather than a command, just like the use of "we". By making it a request rather than a command, the teacher is also implying a desire for the student to do well. While saying, "Remember this" sounds condescending and detached, saying, "Please remember this" sounds softer and more caring.

Our teachers face the daily challenge of trying to get a bunch of teenagers to learn and get their assignments done. While most students have at least some level of motivation, it's still necessary for teachers to pull out all the tricks they can to get us to pay attention to the right things. By using their language cleverly, the best teachers can motivate you without you even realizing it.

The Hunt

Starting with days in preparation
we work and sweat all night
So that we'll all be ready
when the hunting trumpet calls

Our teachers lecture about the fox
(what it looks like and how to prepare)
and yet we can only guess
at how it will try to evade us

The morning comes when we test ourselves
and see if we can catch it
We've done it before, so we should be experts
Yet the hunt is different each time

Students gather with their hunting supplies
and try to calm their nerves while
Restless hounds bark with excitement
and trumpets blare in encouragement

The hunt is long and tiring,
with no rest for the desperate students
we fret and we search and we try to grasp it
but most foxes prefer to run away

For one week, it is all we think about
And obsess over, like Moby's whale
It's huge in our minds and important to us
(but at least whales are easy to see)

The problem with foxes
Is that they are clever;
they know how to hide
and trick their pursuers

But with enough practice,
we are told we will catch it
and bring home the fox,
and then a week of sleep

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With this poem, I decided to try out two literary devices: conceit and allusion. I've never used either of these devices in a work of literature, so I wanted to see if I could use them to create a mood. While I won't give away what the hunt is supposed to represent, I will provide that I'm trying to give a mood of exhaustion and desperation. Inspired by "The Flea", I wanted to come up with my own clever metaphor for something that I was thinking about a lot. When I think of a hunt, I think of hounds barking and trumpets blaring; there's a lot going on. I wanted to bring this feeling of business into the poem to help create a mood that would support my attempted conceit. I decided that this would also be a good chance to use an allusion. As I was writing about stress and obsession, I immediately thought of Moby Dick and his infamous obsession with a white whale.